This page is going to be dedicated to me posting how I do during my treatments. I may or may not be able to post to this every day, it will all depend on how I feel. I am starting this page actually a few days later than my first treatment. I will backdate though and fill in where I have missed where I can.  I will also try to make note that I am writing in late. 

Treatment I :

Week I :
(late write in) November 5th, 2012 ... OMG so ... have you ever been clothes lined? Yup that's exactly what happened to me on Monday! I officially HATE poison cocktail. It's likely the worst thing I have EVER put into my body. Oh well, it's something that I have to do to ensure my cancer is completely gone and doesn't come back. OK so how'd my first treatment go ? It went OK being I got pumped full of poison. It kind of felt like ... well have you ever put a 9 V battery to your tongue and feel all of that tingling all the way through ? Yup, that's exactly what my arm felt like when they began to inject that stuff into me. I also felt INSTANTLY tired, which sucked. It was like someone just took that needle and drained all of my energy out of my body.After was a trying day with so much to get done and still being tired from the treatment. 



( late write in ) November 6th, 2012 ...This was a very very very tiring day for me. I worked on figuring out the nurses schedule for my father who has had to move in with me due to his own cancer illness and inability to care for himself.. I  believe I pushed myself too hard this day and needed rest but oh well! 

( late write in ) November 7th, 2012 ... Today I literally couldn't do much more than sleep all day and night. My body was too weak to do much of anything so sleeping was on my menu for the day in it's entirety. I hope the week gets better. We shall see.

( late write in ) November 10th, 2012 ... Well today was the day I set up to cut my hair off at a salon. I made the appointment in hopes that I could mentally prepare myself for this crazy event that NEVER happens. I literally got my fourth hair cut ever in my life. My sister had the pleasure of getting the first two tries at cutting my hair, and a barber shop got to have my third ( to fix damages from my sisters attempt when I was 3-4 years old ? ). My grandparents decided they wanted to come to my hair cutting experience today so that pictures could be taken. I believe I'm the only female in the family who has the long hair so this was a pretty big deal being I NEVER cut my hair. two very long braids got donated to Locks for Love, which I hope will make more than one wig for some people who really want a nice curly, strawberry blonde hair. They said donations like mine are rare and they rarely ever see donations of the length I gave today. The guy at the front desk even said thanks and he's not even getting a wig from my hair. Anyhow, so when I told them what I was doing I asked the guy at the front desk to get my a salon lady or male who was quite creative in their cutting abilities because I was going to get some crazy funky hair cut to try it out on myself and see how it looked since I was paying for the cut anyhow. Soooo They take me back and the lady gets my braids all tied up and asks if I want to change my mind. I told her I want my hair to get cut so I can donate it before it falls out because I would hate for it to go to waste being I had so much. Sooooo off come the braids! So I almost cry at this point. It wasn't unnoticed though because one of my great friends Wes who went to also get a hair cut to support the hair loss I will be experiencing, came over to comfort me and tell me I was doing great. He's been advocating with all of my co-workers as well trying to get all the pipefitters at work to cut their hair also to support me. I think it'd be great and pretty awesome being most of them are guys, all but two of us anyhow. They'd be loosing only a couple of inches of hair for a few weeks, whereas I'll be completely bald until at least March of 2013. I will have to shame them into cutting their hair haha! My really great friend Wes who cut his hait told me he hasn't cut his hair since he was a kid I don't think and he's decided to keep his hair cut until I can grow mine back. That is probably the single most awesome gesture anyone has done for me and I hope he knows I greatly appreciate it. I didn't expect anyone to even consider cutting their hair, so he is going above and beyond supporting me through these hard times with my treatments. Thank you Wes for being just awesome! It means a lot to me.

Week II

November 12th, 2012 ... Went to see Dr. Antonucci today so he could see how I did with my first treatment. He was quite surprised that the chemo has effected me so strongly. Already I'm losing my appetite, having severe headaches for days after treatments, and very weak. He said that likely the headaches are from the anti-nausea medicine that they are giving to me before treatments. That is one of the side effects. My appetite he said to just eat what tastes good to me right now because what I wanted before is not going to be the same as it was before chemo. He let me know my white cell count was WAY low and so he's putting me on antibiotics for this week and every week after treatments to help my system out. He says that's why I am so weak as well and that I just need to take it easy and stay out of crowds. I said no problem, I'm a home body anyhow and have help with getting around if I need to go somewhere. He wants to see me before my next treatment to make sure I'm doing alright before he gets me all doped up on poison cocktail again. Looks like this is going to be par for the course. Treatment .... headaches for a few days .. weakness and loss of appetite ... YAY! Oh well. I will make it through it. I just have to take life one day at a time and sometimes an hour at a time to make it through. I've got some great support from friends all over.

November 13th, 2012 ... Today I am much more tired than I have been in the mornings. Not sure why that is unless the anti biotic I got put on yesterday is bringing on the  tiredness. Today just very well may be a nap day for me. 

Week III

November 19th, 2012 ... Do I really HAVE to go go back to get more of this poison cocktail. Well the answer technically is no but I probably should anyhow to give myself a better chance of this not coming back. I really hope that this week is better than the lasst treatment. That one knocked my feet right on out from under me! Well ...  I'm off to get some chemo ... some chemo to kill my cancer! Yes I just did that, just laugh about it and read on! ( for those of you who didn't catch it ... think of going to see a wizard and sing along in your head with what I typed ... so people around you don't think you're crazy. (=

 Week of November the 19th treatment 2012 ... probably a better week for treatment being I could actually eat for the holiday this time! I guess that acupuncturist is doing what she's supposed to be doing to me which is helping me through all the side effects of this poison  I take every two weeks. Anyhow, this has been a better week for me this time around, let's hope that it continues on this trend.

Week IV 

No entries

Week V

 December 3rd, 2012 ( backdated ) Well this week was so terrible I'm having to actually backdate it due to how nauseous and worn down I was. I would have never thought that I could have been  as sick as I have been over the course of my treatments, but it seems that I have been put in my place as far as that goes. I officially HATE chemotherapy. I cannot wait for this mess to be done and over with and I pray that I'll never have to do it again.

Week VI

December 10th, 2012 Still having a very rough time with side effects of Chemo this go round. trying to get plenty of rest and not eating very much at all. Maybe next treatment will go better. )=


Week VII

December 22, 2012 ... Well this has been the week from yeah you guessed it ... nausea and being weak all over has been my best friend this week. I'm actually fighting some sort of bacterial infection as well being I cannot shake a stupid fever and my throat has been bugging me all week long. It'd probably help if I had some sort of immune system though, but I really don't at this point in time so I just have to keep taking my meds, and hope for the best. I've spent most of this week in bed due to the inability to actually physically get out of it for more than a few hours at a time without being totally exhausted and needing to sleep again. I think I've slept so much my mind is restless and my body still needs rest. SO not a good place to be in. I'll have to endure it though until I'm well again ... -sigh- I just want to be done with the chemo already but I'm only half way right now. So tired of being tired and feeling iky all over.

WEEK VII

December 24th, 2012 Well still kind of tired this week from chemo last week. trying to prepare for Christmas dinner here at the miller residence. I'm the head chef it seems and will be preparing everything except a few deserts. -flop- Tomorrow is going to be a long day and I'm already tired thinking about it. Oh well right ? Well, I officially had my last red dose of chemo, and will be moving on to a new chemo next time thank GOD! I hope everything they say about it is true and that it doesn't hit me as hard as this red stuff and whatever else they've been mixing in my poison cocktail. I guess I'll have to see though.

WEEK IX

 December 30th, 2012 - Well ... tonight I start a new regiment of drugs ... starting with steroids, benedryl, double dose of Zantac, and another anti-histamine in addition! Looks like I possibly won't be sleeping very well tonight I don't think. We'll see. 

December 31st, 2012 - Treatment today was yeah ... interesting to say the least! I got floored and knocked out by LIQUID benedryl in the VEINS! WAHOO. They should call that stuff liquid sleep! Oh well, I slept great today after wards and get to look forward to my shot tomorrow. -flop- Not a fan of Nulasta AT ALL.

January 2nd, 2013 - <-- almost screwed up the date there. Shot day today and yup I'm tired after wards. Nap for a little while and then I get up to aching bones. I swear it feels like I have some little gnome ... well SEVERAL little gnomes running all over my body on my bones with tiny little hammers. Every once in awhile, one decides to ping my bone in a random spot, along with all the other gnomes. This gradually increases throughout the period of about 24 hours when it peaks and the pinging is constant. Then it begins to finally start to taper off and continues for the next 24-36 hours. Then I finally get SOME relief and I only get a ping here and there a few times an hour for a few more days. Meanwhile, my muscles on like day two or so decide they are going to tense up so tight they try to tone themselves. They are physically flexed for a couple days time and hurt like someone has literally beat me up and left me bruised all over. If ever there were a pain I could do without, it'd be the Nulasta shot pain side effects! Oh and the best part about Nulasta ... after a day or two of getting it my jaw hurts SO bad I can barely chew food. 

January 3rd, 2013 - Acupuncture appt today! Should have had it yesterday when it was actually scheduled but I was  so tired I forgot! I'm feeling SO much better after seeing Trudy and napping for a bit after my treatment. My muscles actually are relaxed in stead of all tensed up and hurting. So nice to have relief!


WEEK X

January 7th, 2013 - Feeling a little tired this week but not near as bad as I have been in the past with my treatments, so either Acupuncture is really hitting good or the new treatment isn't hitting me AS hard. Either way it's nice to get SOME relief and not be so drug down this go around. I hope the trend continues on. 

WEEK XI

January 14th, 2013 -  Treatment day today -flop- I always get SO tired on this new one. That Liquid benedryl is nasty stuff! Talk about making someone sleepy for sure. I think I slept through my treatment at Dr. Antonucci's office today then came home and slept some more. Not near the nausea this go round though which is nice.

January 15th, 2013 - Nulasta shot today *flop* Do I really have to go get it?

January 15th, 2013 - Went for acupuncture today, then to the grocery store on my way home, then came home and barely unpacked groceries and went straight to bed for a 5 hour nap. My body feels much better than normal though when I go get that stupid shot, so I am very grateful for my acupuncturist and what she does for me after my treatments. I'm also trying something new out from my doctor this week. I told him about my problems with the shot and how it's dragging me down every week I get it for days at a time. He said well, we can try some steroids. So I'm on steroids all week to see how they do with me and the side effects of Nulasta. I HOPE it works . We'll see though in a few days time.

January 16th, 2013 - Yup sleep schedule is officially screwed! I was up til 3A.M. this morning! I have been able to do more this week but at the expense of having jitters and not sleeping worth a crap. I honestly don't know which is worse. Sleeping for days on end and letting my body rest, or taking the steroids and not sleeping hardly at all for days on end.  Common sense tells me that not sleeping cannot possibly be good for my body.  Maybe next time I'll not take what the doc says to and reduce the dose a little so I can rest better. Oh well though. This week is almost done and I've been awake for a lot of it cept the first day or so with acupuncture and all. My shot is kicking in today and hurting my bones some, but not near as bad as it had before. The tradeoff for sleep may be worth what it takes away as far as the side effects. I'll know more in a few days though. Until then, no sleep for me and restlessness accompanied by jitters and grumpiness. Yay for steroid side effects!

January 17th, 2013 well I went to bed last night at like midnight thinking I was tired. Took  FOREVER to go to sleep then managed to yeah .. wake up at like 6:30 A.M. and lay there for hours on end waiting for my body to go back to sleep. Seems the steroids are doing their job of keeping me awake. I'm wondering if it's worth it though at the expense of me being able to be up and doing things the past few days. Maybe not so much. Oh well, back to being grumpy and hoping to get some rest tonight.

WEEK XII

 WEEK XIII

January 28th 2013 - Well today was quite interesting! Treatment today which made me very tired and all I wanted to do was go home and nap, however my 8 1/2 month old German Shepherd had a different idea. So I walk in the door and there's a pill bottle of what -used- to be anti-histamine and there's pils all over the floor. I call her vet, and ask what I need to do. They advise me to bring her right in to have her seen to make sure she's ok. Yup there goes my nap time! I drive her to the vet and am there over an hour or so. We draw some bloodwork and go over what I need to look for when I get home in case something actualy does go wrong with her. Yup up late tonight Wahoo! Thanks Anastasia! Oh well Got home and stayed up til damn near midnight to make sure my pup was ok. 

January 29th, 2013 -  Accupuncture today -bounce- so happy to get that done every time I have a trreatment. Trudy is the best! Tonight I'm going to experiment with a bath concoction to maybe help my body not feel so hurt this week. It's a detox solution of ginger, epsom salts, and vinager in REALLY hot water and soak in it for as long as I can. We'll see how that goes tomorrow. I hope it helps. So tired of hurting all week from the nulasta shot. -frowns-

January 30th, 2013 - Soooo tired today. Sister came by randomly to go to the store which was nice. I didn't have to drive to go get more of my ginger and other supplies for my baths that seem to be helping me sleep better at night this time around.    I'd say the meds that  I take too for nasuea help with that as well! Not hurting in my bones just yet today, but only time will tell if that's going to happen or not. I know it will but to what extreme this week? I'm going to hope for not much! I think being on steroids is keeping me from being so tired, but I'm not sure it's actually helping my body with getting the rest that it needs to heal. On a positive note I very well could have had my last treatment this past Monday due to Nuropathy  that I have developed from the chemo. The Doc says that if I still have it come the next treatment I won't be getting it because it can cause the condition to be a permanent thing and we don't want that. It can effect my balance and other things like walking! EEP yeah don't want that at all.  I'll know more about that on February 11th, 2013. -prays for no more chemo-